A Letter to Mom:

Dear Mom,

I hope all is well over in the states. I am all settled in South Kensington and cannot believe how fast time is flying! It’s already been about six weeks and I feel like London is just where I belong. I miss you and dad greatly. Of course, Jess, Maddie and Nicole too. The picture you sent to me of Meeka made me a bit homesick… I miss that dog. Well despite all of this, I have some news. I will not be returning to the states after my semester abroad. I know, this may be shocking. I just think London is where I belong. Between moments that I have witnessed and things I have experienced, I just think I’m more suited to be a Londoner from here on out. Let me explain:

The last picture the Brownell Family took before Sam moved away forever

So there’s this book we’re reading in our Global Comm and Leadership Class called “Watching the English” by Kate Fox and she lays it out perfectly. She talks a lot about English culture and what in fact makes them unique from the rest of the world. I’ll lay out a few examples of the things she discusses and maybe you’ll have more of an understanding about why I’ve decided to stay in London for the rest of my life.

Being happy in London

In the section “Moaning and Complaining”, Kate talks about the different types of complaints British people make. Let me just say, they are much more respectful than how people tend to complain in America. She talks about apologetic complaining on pages 112-113 and states that they English people might says things like “‘Excuse me, I’m terribly sorry, um, but, er, this soup seems to be rather hot- a bit cold really....’”. This scenario is exactly like something I witnessed the other day when I was doing homework in a nearby cafe called Cafe Montparnasse.

Cafe Montparnasse

As I had my headphones in and was sitting in the corner of this french cafe, I overheard a customer talking to his wife about his sandwich being too cold. I couldn’t help, but eavesdrop. I’m assuming because it was his wife (or so it seemed), he didn’t mind saying it a bit more blunt to her. “This is meant to be a hot sandwich and it doesn’t seem like it even touched an oven”, he stated. As you know mom, I’m a waiter back home at TGI Fridays and I deal with customer complaints on a day to day basis. As the man approached the counter to discuss his complaint with the employees, I winced at the thought of being in their shoes. I know exactly what it’s like to be in their position and I was prepared for him to give them an ear-full. I just hoped he wouldn’t be too mean. “Excuse me, I’m so sorry”, he began. “This sandwich is absolutely delicious, would you mind warming it up a bit more?” My jaw dropped. Was this just a rare type of person that knew how to politely handle the situation, or were all Brits like this? After reading Kate Fox’s segment about this, I found the answer. It’s incredibly common that the English apologize for everything, even if they are complaining. In fact, ever since this incident I have been noticing many more people handling these types of situations very similarly. One time at TGI Fridays I was told that I was a disappointment simply because the table’s dessert took more than fifteen minutes. Why can’t all people be polite with their complaints? It would sure make my life more pleasant.

Sam at TGI Fridays hiding from complaining customers

Another thing that has me hooked to stay here is how the English treat their day to day schooling and jobs. As I’m sure you are well aware mom, stress levels are at an all time high when it comes to school and work in America. We have a myriad of deadlines, so much on our plates, and a culture that pressures us to worry possibly more than we have to. It’s not like that across the pond. I recently went out to drinks with an English mutual friend for drinks. My friend from Savannah, Georgia told me that he would take me somewhere cool and was additionally a super outgoing and friendly guy. I wanted to meet more British people so I decided to go! When talking about his work, he made it seem like there was very little pressure behind it. He told me he had nineteen client meetings and more additional tasks to complete in the coming week. I asked him if that was stressful, to which he replied “That would be silly to stress over work that much. It’s just some client meetings, I’ll get through it”. This was another jaw dropping moment to me. Why was he so laid back about something that seemed stressful? Oh, that’s right. It’s because he’s British. In Kate Fox’s book, she talks about this exactly when discussing “The Muddle Rules” on pages 67-68. She lists a bunch of ways the English view their work. She says “We are serious about work, but not too serious”, “We believe that work is a duty, but we wouldn’t go as far as to call it a ‘sacred’ duty…”, and “we find the whole subject of money distasteful…”. If I were to write an American book about the way we treat work, I would say that we are TOO serious, many of us would call it our SACRED duty, and money is a HUGE factor that many people LOVE to discuss. Not to mention, my first week here I learned that the English are required to have paid time off while we aren’t required to have any in America. It just doesn’t seem fair, does it?

Let's all take a chill pill

So mom, now you see my point. I have realized that I was born to be raised as an Englishman. I hope this news does not upset you, as I will be home to visit every Christmas.

Love you always,

Your son Sam

P.S. After spending time to write this letter- I was just informed of this thing called a Visa that legally require me to come home. So I’ll see you on April 28th I guess.